It is just a picture I have on my refrigerator, but I can tear up everytime I look at it and remember. When I saw the picture for the first time I realized God's love for me. That may sound very fundamental..."Jesus loves me", but they weren't words simply spoken I knew it deep within my soul. I saw in the picture the child of God I am and I KNEW His love for me was just the way I am. I saw the loving, kind, gentle friend, mother and child of God I am. I did not have critical thoughts looking at myself~ my heart was filled with love for who I am. That may sound conceited, but it wasn't. I had compassion on myself and I received God's love for me in that moment.
That picture has been on my refrigerator for 1 1/2 years. I know it was a gift to me from my Father, for He knew what was ahead of me. He equiped me to remember the truth and that picture is a symbol to me. I would have never thought I struggled with this concept "God loves me". But I have come to realize for years I have found comfort and esteem in my Christian walk. I could only feel good when I was good. Translation "Perfect". I wanted no one to be able to point a "shame" finger at me. I struggled inside to be perfect as to not cause another to stumble.
~Then I divorced~
I was wide open for the enemy to attack who I am...he whispered in my ear..."you are not worthy."
..."You are not perfect."
..."You couldn't save your marriage, you divorced, you gave up."
..."Others think less of you."
..."How can God use you now?"
The life I had lived was believing God's love for me was dependent on my works. I would have argued that was NOT the case. However, my faith was being put to the test. Who was I going to listen to? The father of lies? or My Father in heaven who loves me?
Daily I take up my sword~ the word of God and I go to battle with the truth of who I am. God's word says.."Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus..." Romans 8:1
..."There is no one righteous, not even one;" Romans 3:10
...I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing! Galations 2:21
..."The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. what can man do to me?" Hebrews 13:6
..."For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Do you know how much God loves you?...The Father's love for us is real whether we feel it or not. Tell yourself the truth. The Father gave His Son for You! Someday we will see Him face to face and there will be no doubt that 'God's love never ceases. Never...God doesn't love us less if we fail or more if we succeed.' (Max Lucado) We can fight the battle, the lies of the enemy and win! There is nothing that can separate us from the love of God.(Romans 8:38-39)
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