I AM JUST A BRANCH ON THE VINE~

James 1:19-20 This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.

Recently I entered the garage while my husband was working on his motorcycle. He said he was getting frustrated, because he was running into a problem. I teased him a little and quoted the verse anger does not produce the righteousness of God and I hugged him then quickly left with a smile. 

Five minutes later I am putting laundry away when I noticed my new top ruined. I stomped into the garage holding up my top with my voice not so happy "What happened?" I won't bore you with my rant, but it was not pretty. Seriously, I had just been in God's word and I failed miserably! I think of the old hymn "I Need Thee Every Hour". How about every minute and every second. 

My anger was short lived and I returned to the garage to say, "I know it seems ironic that I quoted the verse and then behaved so badly..."then I gave a humble apology. All the while my husband showed mercy toward me.

One morning I thanked my husband for loving me and others with a cup that is always full. It runs over and never seems to run out. He said, "I'm just a branch on the vine." 

John 15:5 “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing". 

It is not about trying harder to do good. It isn't even about discipline and training as much. It is about knowing where our help comes from.

Psalm 121:1-2 I will lift up my eyes to the hills—From whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.

Dear Lord, Help me. Amen.

828

She said proudly, "I will name it . . .828!"

"Name what?" I asked. (Hope names everything. Each and every stuffed animal she owns has a name and you best remember they are part of the family)

She said, "My new wheelchair!"

I was confused, "What does that mean?"

"A number." She said bluntly with her mind made up.

She had no further explanation and just about that time her stepdad came home and we introduced him to the newest addition, " Meet 828." 

He said, "As in Romans 8:28?" And Hope quickly agreed. 

Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good, to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

I was remembering this conversation from 2 years ago . . .At the time we were publishing our book In That Secret Place. 

When Hope named her wheelchair It dawned on me ~ Romans 8:28 the first verse I ever memorized and held in my heart since a young girl was the very verse I had overlooked in writing our story. How could I have forgotten this verse in our story, it is our story! It was too late for a rewrite, we had a signed contract and were waiting for my last endorsement.

excerpt taken from a previous post, Special Prayer Answered:

     ~ Since the beginning of my work on this book, 15 years ago- I prayed to one day have Melody Green's endorsement. (she was the widow of Keith Green. A Christian musician, who had a huge impact on my life.) I contacted her once I signed the contract for the book. The return response was they do not give endorsements. I was discouraged for a couple minutes, then I believed God wanted to bless me. I contacted them again and I prayed believing He would change their hearts. We waited and prayed over the next 2 weeks. They did reconsidered and Melody wrote a beautiful endorsement!!

The endorsement included reference to Romans 8:28~

Melody's endorsement read, "Terri and Hope's amazing story of love, sacrifice and forgiveness is a testament to God's ability to work all things together for good. Hope was a miracle baby, and her vibrant heart is a tender proclamation of God's enduring love for us all." Melody Green, President of Last Days Ministries.

God brought our entire book together from cover to cover in His perfect time and then sealed it with a kiss Romans 8:28.

Trust and love God. No matter what things look like around us we can have confidence in His promise to work all things together for our good.

Boast in this. . .and you will find power!

I was reading Luke 18:9-14. A parable Jesus told to some who were confident in their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else: The parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector. Both men went to the temple to pray and the Pharisee stood up and prayed, "God I thank you that I am not like the other men- robbers, evildoers, adulterers- or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get." The tax collector stood at a distance and would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God have mercy on me, a sinner.' Jesus said, "I tell you this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

The Pharisee was a man girded in works and prideful of his accomplishments ~ He stood upright before the throne of God comparing his strengths to other's sins. He did not humble himself and recognizing his own weaknesses or shortcomings. Nor would he as long as He focused on another's failures. His boasting is in the flesh not in what Jesus has done for him or helped him overcome. 

The tax collector was coming to Jesus with head bowed in his weakness asking for mercy from his Savior. His heart was broken before God as he beat his breast. He saw his sin and did not hide his weakness. The tax collector knew his need for mercy and came humbly before God.  

2 Corinthians 12:9-11 Tells us what we are to boast about....... Our Weaknesses!! That is the answer! It is in our weakness we are made strong and this is what we truly can boast about and give Glory to God. Thanking Him for our weakness, because it is out of our brokenness that God will shine and touch other's lives.

...."My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2  Corinthians 12:9-11

I can hear myself in the Pharisee's prayer at times. I have always prided myself on being a "truth teller" and not a "liar".  As I climbed upon my pedestal. In the past I have found false security in pursuit of perfection. Truth is of course that perfection is not attainable here on earth. Sometimes I still catch myself caught up in the lie, "it is up to you, Terri." Answer is: I will thirst and hunger after righteousness knowing all the while that it is God I am confident in. Praying that He who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6 This is my prayer for me and for you. 

There is freedom in Jesus and power in surrender.

~ "What is impossible with men is possible with God."~ Luke 18:27

Complete Trust~ you will find rest in 2014!

There I go again...

~ trying to figure things out 

~ forcing solutions

These behaviors will NEVER unlock the door to peace.

P~E~A~C~E is where I desire to abide. I can only find this in completely trusting in God. Everyday seek His face and walk in the way of my Savior.

•I have learned you cannot change another person. 

•I  have learned people are responsible for their own decisions. 

•I know truth is~ someone else's actions or lack of~ is none of my business and should not affect my happiness.

(That one is difficult, because I still choose to allow it to affect me ~ sadly more than I want to admit.)

 First step in recovery is... 

•awareness

•acceptance

•action

It appears I sometimes still get stuck on the second step 'acceptance'. When I am having trouble with acceptance I am really having trouble trusting in God...bottom line.

The answer is....If I want complete rest...I must have complete trust in God to handle my problems, concerns, situations, difficulties, etc. This is where my CHOICE comes in~ I choose this year to continue my growth in this area and I lay it down again at your feet Lord. You are the great 'I Am' and I am not. 

Romans 15:13 Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, in the power of the Holy Spirit.

Is there something you continue to struggle with again and again. It is a New Year~ new beginnings ~ ask yourself what attempts to steal your P~E~A~C~E? Then ask yourself what part do you play and choose to completely trust and rest in Him in 2014!

~Cast out the Angel of light~

This Thanksgiving the Deceiver comes even as we thank God for His goodness and whispers (not audibly) "You are being prideful ~ bragging by being thankful." Many may stop there, even if their motives are pure and not give God the glory for the great things He has done. All due to fear of man.  Or maybe the Deceiver whispers, "Your future is uncertain focus on that. You don't have time to be thankful. Too many problems to figure out."

The Deceiver is crafty and will stop at nothing to keep us from thanksgiving. Do you know why? Because God Almighty inhabits the praise of His people ~ just praise Him now for all He has done and see that He is there. There is no greater power than the presence of God. Don't let the Deceiver rob you! Lock the back doors of your mind and keep your mind set on things above. He is an uninvited guest! Instead Shout your praises from the hilltops, because God deserves our praises. A thankful heart is a happy heart!

 Psalm 28:7 The Lord is my strength and my shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I BURST out in songs of thanksgiving.

 

Overcoming~ Is not "self will" ~it is "dying to self"

I want to lay down my pride and live in humility because I know how I have tried:

 

- to fix

- to control

- to figure out 

This leads to frustration, anger which equals "loss of peace". 

Jesus came so we may have peace abundantly and overflowing. The power of the cross that saved me is the same power available to me to overcome difficult situations, people and circumstances that I have no control over. By trusting in God whose word is truth...I know He cares for me. He cares about everything I face in this world. He knows my heart seeks after Him - To be like Him. So when my actions are in opposition to my hearts desire, I am on the wrong track and I cry out to the Lord, "Help me." 

I understand what Paul said in the Bible, paraphrased, "I do the very thing I don't want to do." Well I use to think in terms of big bad things- but Paul hungered after righteousness. He was just like us, who are believers in Jesus, who long to do the right thing,  but fail. For example I become inpatient or irritated by someone else's actions that effect me. I sometimes fail to see my part in the scenario and irritation grows into anger and anger leads to bitterness and resentment when it is fed. This is where God is helping me to see my choice: 

- to react or to trust in Him

- to worry or to trust and pray to Him

- to control or to let go and let Him

- to force a solution or to take it easy 

Everyday many things occur that are out of our control and we do not have to behave as we always have, we have choices. God is right there ready to lift you up and through the situation every single time! To be aware of our choices we must not focus on the problem, because that will lie to us every time! I have been experiencing lately as I seek after God more deeply in this area that the problem does not disappear, but it miraculously, suddenly, supernaturally losses it's power over me. It is beyond me, because I can still be pretty worked up~ and I stop and thank God! Yea, I have been known to get it stirred up again by simply talking about it, because the problem is still there. But God knows I hunger after Him and want my heart pure and I believe He intervenes supernaturally and helps me to let it go! Again and again...if need. 

I give the praise to God, for I am SO thankful. He has guided and led me patiently along this path, as I have followed Him. Not perfect have I been, but faithful and longing always for a deeper walk, that I could not do on my own. Sometimes it is possible to appear and act politically correct, but if my heart is not right then it is to no avail. Because the heart is deceitful above all else and pride is the root of all evil. Jesus is the only one who can cleanse a heart and make it pure. This is where I am...many people don't know the struggles and "crosses we carry" but God knows. 

I pray now too as Hope prays often, "Lord, give me a new heart, cleanse my heart." My precious girl, she knows too her heart is not pure without Jesus. 

Thank you Jesus for a clean heart! Help me as I walk through this day after You!

Verses: 

Luke 9:23, Proverbs 22:4, John 14:26-27, 1Corinthians 1:18, Romans 7:15-25, Matthew 5:6, Romans3:10,Titus 3:5, 1Petet 5:7, Philippians 4:6,7,13,Matthew 6:25-27, Psalms 121:1-2, Proverbs 3:5-6, 1Corinthians 10:13, Ephesians 4:2-3, Hebrews 12:14-15, Isaiah 55:8-9, James 3:13-18, Proverbs 11:2, 1 Corinthians 13:4, Jeremiah 17:9, Psalms 51:10, Matthew 5:8, John 5:30, Hebrews 4:15-16

Beautiful. . .

I have been blessed to be the mother of a daughter who never concerns herself with appearances!  Living in our society in this day and age this is HUGE. Hope never request to look at herself in the mirror. I never happen upon her staring at herself in the mirror. There have been times although she has wanted to wear makeup and she puts it on herself...yikes! Hope has taught me much about self acceptance, not by what she says, but by her actions. There is no preoccupation or concern for what others approve of or think of her.

Have you seen the commercial for Sonic's crispy chicken? Two guys are in the car talking about the crispy chicken and one guy says, "It (the crispy chicken) has taught me a real important life lesson." Second guy asks, "Like what?" He answers, "It is what's on the outside that counts!" Second guy says, "No one says that. Everyone says it is what is on the inside that is important." First guy, "No It's all about appearances."

That is funny, because we all know truth is . . . it is what is on the inside that really matters. Beauty is only skin deep. . . we have all known people who were pretty until you knew them and their personality made them not so much. However, I also believe it is true that we as a society have fallen into the deception ~ what is on the outside is what is most important. I don't know about you, but I never go to work without makeup on. I look in the mirror many times throughout the day and freshen up. I have a magnifying mirror that sees it all! I don't believe there is anything wrong with looking our best and taking care of our bodies. What do you see in the mirror? Are you comparing or criticizing yourself? "I look old." "Look another wrinkle." "I have gained more weight."

Reinforce the truth of God's word each time an untrue surfaces:
 

"Your beauty should be the invading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." 1 Peter 3:3-4

Charm is deceptive, and beauty fades; but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised. 

Proverbs 31:30

Here is to the most beautiful girl in the world to me and I don't think I am partial! :)

 

 

We are all like grasshoppers?!

I was running this morning when I heard a verse I had not paid attention to before...

He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth, and its people are like grasshoppers. Isaiah 40:22

I stopped running and looked it up on my Bible Gateway. Grasshoppers? It really hit me funny! It kinda reminds me of how my husband and I like to look in people's window at night (as we drive by houses on our way from here to there~ not peeping as a hobby!) and the lights are on and you see people moving around and living life. We reflect on it every time. . .maybe that is how God looks down on us as we go hopping about as grasshoppers? I know it is being used metaphorically and I like the picture. I believe it puts our life into God's perspective and if we allow it to penetrate our mind we will know "He has got "this" under control. 

I believe it is a message for today with everything that is gong on in the government, all the unknowns, insurance costs...expense of living growing to be more than what we earn. The path our country is taking = many unknowns and anxiety is rising. I could see it in the parking lot at the grocery today. People are distracted in a hurry, not paying attention. We as Believers do not want to walk in fear, because we know who holds the future and our worries, frustrations, anger, rage add nothing only take away our peace of mind. We can trust in Him who has always been. Let God's word saturate your heart.

Isaiah 40:21-31 
Do you not know? 
Have you not heard?
Has it not been declared to you from the beginning?
Have you not understood from the foundations of the earth? 
It is He who sits above the circle of the earth,
And its inhabitants are like grasshoppers,
Who stretches out the heavens like a curtain
And spreads them out like a tent to dwell in.
He it is who reduces rulers to nothing,
Who makes the judges of the earth meaningless. 
Scarcely have they been planted,
Scarcely have they been sown,
Scarcely has their stock taken root in the earth,
But He merely blows on them, and they wither,
And the storm carries them away like stubble. 

“To whom then will you liken Me

That I would be his equal?” says the Holy One. 

Lift up your eyes on high

And see who has created these stars,

The One who leads forth their host by number,

He calls them all by name;

Because of the greatness of His might and the strength of His power,

Not one of them is missing. 

Why do you say, O Jacob, and assert, O Israel,“My way is hidden from the Lord,

And the justice due me escapes the notice of my God”? 

Do you not know? 

Have you not heard?

The Everlasting God, the Lord,

 the Creator of the ends of the earth does not become weary or tired.

His understanding is inscrutable.

 He gives strength to the weary, 

And to him who lacks might He increases power. 

Though youths grow weary and tired,

And vigorous young men stumble badly, 

Yet those who wait for The Lord

Will gain new strength;

They will mount up with wings like eagles,

They will run and not get tired,

They will walk and not become weary. 

He is above All things ~ and NOTHING is hidden from Him ~ not even the grasshoppers. 

If you don't know Jesus as your Savior then today is the day, for tomorrow may never come. Simply pray "Jesus I pray knowing you are the one true God and you died for my sins, I repent of my sins and ask that you forgive me of my sins that I may live for you and someday live eternally with you in heaven." You will never be alone and as you pray and seek after God with all your heart He will lead and guide your steps. Read and obey His word daily. 

God's love ~ extremely personal!

We are not invisible to God and our comings and goings are not in secret. He is the lover of our soul and He pursues us with that love.

Following our church service yesterday a woman stopped My husband and I. She had been seated directly behind us during the service and we were wearing our Sons of God MC colors. It was her first Sunday to church in many years due to circumstances and personal struggles. She said, "When the usher seated me directly behind you I knew I was in the right place." She told us about her son having a brain tumor many years ago when he was very young. They had lived in NJ at the time and there was a benefit for him. She remembered the Sons of God motorcycle club showed up and ministered to her in a very special way. Her son did not survive and through the years she has struggled to know God's love for her. As she shared her story tears filled her eyes and ours too. She came to church this morning by herself, seeking after God. It was no coincidence ~ God had ordered our seats!

Every moment of our life is an opportunity ~ To be honest as the usher seated us up front I felt uncomfortable. I wanted to pick my own seat more toward the middle where I am comfortable. As I submitted to the usher and sat where he directed I had not given it a thought that something so simple was exactly where God wanted me.

I am in awe of our Father in heaven who is not too busy ~ He sees us and He knows us. Psalm 139 He says He knows the number of hairs on our head. (Matt 10:30) As much as I love my daughter I do not know how many hairs are on her head. This woman was seeking after God and just as He has promised in Jeremiah 29:13 ~you will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. God kept His promise and whispered in her ear, "See how I love you, my child."

Walking, living image of God~

We are His workmanship created in Christ Jesus. As a believer and follower of Jesus I want to be conformed to His image more everyday. I believed on Jesus in 5th grade after attending a camp. A missionary spoke about hell and I knew I did not want to go there for sure. I loved Jesus and knew He was the truth. Since that day I have never turned back. What started out as a simple step of faith set my life on a path toward my heavenly home. Not that I have lived a perfect life, but I have desired after His way for my life. It is amazing to me how much growing I still have to do. There will never be an end until I see the Gates of Heaven til then I am still in the race.

After watching Schindler's List again the other night as it was on TV, I cried and cried at the end:When Oskar Schindler broke down realizing how many more Jews he could have saved from death if he had denied himself simple pleasures of life. Read Below:

Oskar Schindler:I could have got more out. I could have got more. I don't know. If I'd just... I could have got more.
Itzhak Stern:Oskar, there are eleven hundred people who are alive because of you. Look at them.
Oskar Schindler:If I'd made more money... I threw away so much money. You have no idea. If I'd just...
Itzhak Stern:There will be generations because of what you did.
Oskar Schindler:I didn't do enough!
Itzhak Stern:You did so much.
[Schindler looks at his car]
Oskar Schindler:This car. Goeth would have bought this car. Why did I keep the car? Ten people right there. Ten people. Ten more people.
[removing Nazi pin from lapel]
Oskar Schindler:This pin. Two people. This is gold. Two more people. He would have given me two for it, at least one. One more person. A person, Stern. For this.
[sobbing]
Oskar Schindler:I could have gotten one more person... and I didn't! And I... I didn't!

What is really important in life? It is a good reminder. . . Life is what is important. Life everlasting ~ this life is but a vapor.
James 4:14 Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.
Let us run this race with the end in mind~ sharing the hope that lives within us with the lost along the way.

Following in His Footsteps

     If there was anyone that ever walked the face of this earth that was justified to stand up for his rights against all the injustice done to Him it was Jesus. This past week at church our pastor shared about Jesus suffering prior to His crucifixion. We all know how He was horribly beaten, whipped, mocked and a crown of thorns pounded into his scalp, spit on and then crucified on a cross. But really stop and think about His reaction~ He said not a word in His defense...

I have thought about His silence all week ~ He did not say:
"Do you not know who I AM?"
"I am doing this for you! Unthankful people!"
"Stupid people, how can you not see 'I am the Messiah' you are studied in the Law in the prophecies of my coming!"

     He said nothing! He did not respond with self-righteous indignation or in self-defense. When He did speak, he said, "Father forgive them, for they know not what they do." His speech was NOT filled with anger or irritation. His heart was full of compassion and love. Wow!

    Yes, He is God and we are human. However, we have the same power available to us to overcome. To walk in the power of the cross. I want to walk in Jesus footsteps. He said not a word and when He did speak he prayed.

    I thought about how Jesus prepared himself for that day. . . what happened before He suffered on the way to the cross. He went to pray in the Garden of Gethsemane. He said to his disciples "my soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death." He asked them to stay with him and pray. He prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."

     The challenges I face seem insignificant in comparison, but the truth is Jesus suffered so we can live and have life abundantly. It is for Him I live. So in difficult situations, trying situations (I am really thinking of difficult days at work- which I have had recently) I need to be prepared ahead of time ~ knowing what lays ahead of me. Jesus example encourages me. I will not fail to call on My Father in Heaven to help me. His will not mine. Fill me with your compassion and love overflowing so I am prepared in the 12th hour, when my human strength is weakest. We don't have to do it on our own. Jesus has overcome the grave and we can too! There is peace, power and victory. I will look at each difficulty as an opportunity to love someone and become more like Christ Jesus my Lord!

A Daddy's Love

     I called my dad yesterday for Christmas. Well, actually my husband picked up the phone and asked, "What is Dad's number?" and he called. It is always so good to hear my Dad's voice, because I can feel his love for me across the miles. He lives in Kentucky, where I grew up. My parents divorced when I was in 5th grade and my Dad remained close to my sister and I. Was he perfect? Did we sometimes wait for him to show up to take us for the weekends? I really have never focused on the imperfections from my childhood. What I do know is my Dad was always there~ a phone call away. As I spoke to my Dad last night I honestly can say it was like a warm blanket over me. He sees me and knows my heart. He knows I love God and have followed Him all my life. He is proud of me and choices I have made. He is so happy for the love I have been blessed with in my marriage. My Dad loves me. He wants the best for me. Without hesitation he accepted my husband with arms wide open~ into the family, because he had a Father's eyes for me.

     My dad has lived a quiet faith in God. He is a man faithful and honest. I am proud to be his daughter. Because of his love for me I can see that this has had a tremendous effect on my relationship with God. "They" say if you received love from your earthly father~ then it is easier to receive the love of your Father in heaven. I am constantly growing in this area. Realizing it is not based on my performance or lack of, but because I am His child. Thank you Daddy for loving me unconditionally. You have been a beautiful example of my heavenly Father's love for me too.

Be Careful Little Eyes What You See...

I remember singing this song as a child:

Be careful little eyes what you see, Oh, be careful little eyes what you see. For the Father up above is looking down with love. Oh, be careful little eyes what you see.

Be careful little ears what you hear, Oh, be careful little eyes what you hear. For the Father up above is looking down with love. Oh, be careful little ears what you hear.

Today while on the computer looking at facebook and twitter I was led to a YouTube video exposing evil of the music industry. I will not post it, although it was revealing of the powers of darkness. After finishing the video I am reminded of the devil's schemes in this area. When he is exposed he fights back. I need to write this blog today to encourage you all to be self-controlled and alert. 1 Peter 4:8 Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith~We must guard our hearts and minds. Just that little bit of information I was exposed to today, even as it was revealing of the darkness, could be used to draw in and distract.  After the video I immediately wanted to restore my mind to the goodness of God and His faithfulness. I am sad for those who are leaving the door open to the "angel of light" without even realizing. Call him lucifer, satan or any one of his demons, believe it or not, there is a battle for your soul. Ephesians 6:12-17 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth bucked around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray . . . 

In light of the shooting in Newtown,  a door left open and evil was entertained. That evil is prowling around all of us. We recognize murder as evil, but the devil's schemes are devious. Live for God. Psalms 34:14  Turn from evil, do good; seek peace and pursue it.

Cheerful Heart is good medicine!

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22


I was decorating the Christmas tree the other night with the help of Hope. She was so excited to be of assistance and I was taking full advantage of it. She drove her wheelchair around to the very spot she wanted to hang a special ornament then she said, "Proverbs 17:22 Do you have somewhere you can read this from? It is in your Bible. Can you get the Bible and read it?" I do not want to pass up these moments~ so I took the time. Proverbs 17:22 A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. I told her that was a beautiful verse. Hope then thrust an ornament toward me with a proud smile. It was a little mouse dressed as a nurse holding a spoonful of heart shaped medicine drops. A cheerful heart is good medicine.

What is cheerful? Love is! What is love? Love is...patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast, is not proud, is not rude, is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13

So love forgives quickly, turns from evil, thinks on what is right and pure. Obeys God's word and peace fills your heart. A cheerful heart is good medicine ! 

Thank you ~ my dear friends!

     This week I have been troubled by something. You know that saying~ you don't know another person's hardships until you have walked a mile in their shoes? I do not want to be that person who bemoans past difficulties in order to receive love and understanding from others. However, there has been a silence on my part in the past to protect. It was not out of denial, it was my self perseverance and protection mode. As I have walked this road since my divorce I daily remind myself I live to glorify God and it is Him who I seek to please. He alone knows my heart.  I know I have struggled with judging so I understand those who judge and I have been one to withhold and punish~ so I get it. It falsely seems like the correct behavior at times. . . I still find myself doing this more often than I would like to admit. I believe those who are more aware of the mercy and forgiveness they have received throughout their life - are able to extend it to others freely. I have been that person in the past who has withheld my encouragement or acceptance of someone I did not deem worthy. They had to prove themselves faithful, trustworthy = perfect. Not too many of those out there. So now as I have been on the other side of receiving, I see clearly it is not how Christ calls us to love. I have received great mercy, love and forgiveness and I am thankful to be growing in this area of extending the same to others. Who am I? Not a perfect person, but I have the perfect example of unconditional love.

Today I write this with a VERY thankful heart to many dear friends who have shown the same love to me. . . I have learned so much from you.

4 Books that have changed my Life!

First and foremost #1 is God's words. True and powerful. I need it, as food for my soul and water for my thirst. Last night as I was "stressing out" as Hope refers to it. Her and my husband, Don began to sing, "Shout to the Lord all the earth let us sing. Power and majesty praise to the King. Mountains fall down and the seas roar at the sound of your Name." (I hope I got the words right, because Hope usually is correcting me as I sing, so excuse any wrong words). The praise song from God's word lifted my soul and I became thankful. I know if I am discontent it is, because I have neglected to spend adequate time being nourished by God's word. The answer is to slow down, sit down and pull out my Bible and praise Him. It works every time!!

The other 3 books:
During a period of great growth in my life I was reading daily from Courage to Change, One Day at a Time in Al-Anon and The Language of Letting Go. These 3 books helped me learn how to keep my focus off fixing and controlling other people and recognizing what that looked like~ because I didn't even realize I did it. Let's just give one example: If you say something once, that is OK. If you repeat yourself, then you are trying to control or change a person or situation to what is your own desires= to what makes you comfortable. I also learned how to change this way of thinking and behaving ~ to acceptance, love and letting go. Over responsiblity and care giving can enable an other's growth and responsibility for them self. This can be frustrating, overwhelming in the beginning as you let go, but it is a more joyful way of living. The awareness and practical application these books brought into my life are immeasurable. I have learned to recognize quicker when I am trusting in myself instead of trusting in God.

As Don and Hope finished singing I joined them,  "I sing for joy at the works of your hands forever I praise you, forever I stand. Nothing compare to the promise I have in YOU!"

Special Prayer Answered. . .

      ~God has reached down and touched my heart. Yesterday I received a very special endorsement from Melody Green, Keith Green's widow. She runs Last Days Ministry at www.keithgreen.com.

     ~ Since the beginning of my work on this book, 15 years ago- I prayed to one day have Melody's endorsement. I contacted her once I signed the contract for the book. The return response was they do not give endorsements. I was discouraged for a couple minutes, then I believed God wanted to bless me. I contacted them again and I prayed believing He would change their hearts. I waited and prayed over the next 2 weeks. They did reconsidered and Melody wrote a beautiful endorsement!! I was excited beyond words when I received the endorsement, all I could do was smile and cry! I knew God's love for me is real and active.

     Keith Green had a major impact on my life as a teenager. I loved his music and his passion for Jesus. He had a huge heart for mission work. The Lord spoke strongly to me through his ministry and at a young age I was drawn to missions. Keith and Melody were also prolife and educated many through tracks. I believe this is where I first gathered information about protecting life.

    Keith died in a plane crash in the early 80's and his ministry continues on through the work his wife. On my mission to Ghana, Africa 7 years ago I sang one of his songs in a small village church, I know my Redeemer lives! Now God has chosen to bless me with this very special endorsement to show His Love for ME!

     We need not be afraid to come to God and cry out to Him. He loves us and is always making a way to show His love for us. Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.

  

Did I really hear You right?

Have you ever asked God to give you a sign?
~Show me what to do?
~Open this door if you want me to walk through.
~Shut this door if it is not your will.

 I know I have and have even been known to ask God to confirm the sign He showed me. I guess I am not alone ~ there was a man in the Bible who did the same thing~ Gideon. In my opinion he really pushed it asking for 3 signs! He had fear in his heart. He wanted to trust God. I was surprised by God's patience and love toward Gideon. He knew Gideon's heart and knew he wanted to serve Him and obey. Gideon lacked confidence. Stepping out in faith against fear of man and the unknown, takes knowing who you put your trust in. I want to put my trust in the Creator of the universe.

I did not ask for another sign~ in regards to the completion of In That Secret Place ~ An Abortion Survivor's Story. My last blog I shared how God made it very clear to me with the roar of thunder and electricity shutting off as the last page of the book printed and came to rest on the computer desk..."It is Finished".  I knew who created that thunder and I knew the timing was specific and I knew the message was for ME! There has not been a doubt, except for a small section in the book ~ 2 paragraphs to be exact. I was considering changing or removing. I felt exposed . . . too vulnerable. . . I wanted to protect myself. I was struggling and questioning, slightly compromising, possibly? It didn't seem that big a deal or was it? I was not sure.

As we sat in church this past Sunday and listened to the Pastor preach on the topic of "Going" where the Lord has called you and being obedient no matter what. . . my husband noticed a teeny tiny piece of paper on the floor with the number 29 on it. He wondered if it was a message of some sort. He turned to Psalms chapter 29 and it read:

...vs3-5
                                The voice of the Lord is over the waters;
            the God of glory thunders, the Lord thunders over the might waters.
            The voice of the Lord is powerful; the voice of the Lord is majestic.
                               The voice of the Lord breaks the cedars; .... 
vs 7-9
                     The voice of the Lord strikes with flashes of lightning.
                             The voice of the Lord shakes the desert;. . .
             The voice of the Lord twists the oaks and strips the forests bare.
                               And in his temple all cry, "Glory!"
vs11
     The Lord gives strength to his people the Lord blesses his people with peace.

Update:
Ok the two paragraphs are staying in the book and I will trust in the God of glory! He wants my obedience and trust. He has shown me His power and made it known He will give me strength. Who will I fear man or the Lord? May I be faithful in the message you have given me.
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Remember always look for the Lord and you will find Him. He will make your path straight when you trust in Him with all your heart. There is nothing to be feared for the Lord is our strength!

I hear you Lord..."It is finished!"

 

     ~Yesterday, I clicked on Joyce Meyer message entitled "Faithfulness" and began to listen on the computer. I was passing time as I waited for my almost completed manuscript to finish printing out so I could again critique it. I had not printed it out in 2 years, but had only worked on the computer changing and rearranging. Just as the LAST page printed and came to rest on the desk I watched the electricity flicker and shut off~ followed by a loud roar of thunder. There was no mistaking the message I was receiving. I hear you Lord I said outloud and I began to cry. . . "It is finished."

   ~The power immediately came back on and as I listened to Joyce ~ God continued to make it clear. Joyce read from the Bible, "'Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus'(Philippians 1:6). God always finishes what He begins."

   ~I needed a sign and He showed me. "It is finished! There is no further improvement or change to be done. I am the Lord your God and I say so(boom)!" Ok so I did not actually hear those words audibly, but in my spirit I know my God's voice in the thunder and His timing was unmistakeable. It has been 15 years in the making and many drafts, I needed God to make it clear and He did. He spoke to me as Joyce says, "And we need to finish what we start." Today I will call the publishing company.
                                                   ~~~~~~~~~~~

   ~Update I signed a contract and book will be ready in October sometime!!!~

~Simple and True~ Divorced? God Loves you!

Today Hope and I were talking in the driveway while waiting for her bus to arrive. She became very serious and looked up at me from her wheelchair and said, "You know God loves you even though you divorced my Dad." Then she sang a song for me, "God is a friend who will always be there He will be there right beside me. When I am troubled or when I am down He is a friend who can always be found."

 I could see in her eyes she sincerely was relaying a message to me from my Father in heaven.  A message she herself had found comfort in. My heart was touched and I let her know how much with a hug and kiss. I told her she was very wise and that she just shared a message everyone needs to know. Simple and True. Although I know this is true, sometimes it is too simple. I must complicate it with my doubts. Now I would argue I have no doubt, however, my insecurity and shame would scream otherwise. Believing it is secretly hidden I have recently had a friend ask me, "Why do you believe you are not worthy?" I quickly responded that wasn't the situation then it was clear to me as if a light was turned on, she was absolutely right! She could see it and she heard it in my conversation.

Secretly I believe I wear a capital "D". This is a lie from Satan, because being divorced does not define who I am in the eyes of my God. He sees me through the righteousness of Jesus. Jesus paid the dept for the forgiveness of sins. I love the Lord Jesus with my whole heart and at times believe I am only just beginning to comprehend His love for me. In my failures ~ imperfections, mistakes He is right there loving me. I would tell anyone and everyone the same and believe it for them, because it is the Simple and True message from God's Holy word.

I continue to discipline myself in God's word ~ to separate others conditional love and actions from the truth of God's word. "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons neither present nor the future, nor any powers,  neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romains 8:38,39)

People will let us down and life will happen ~ not according to plan. If expectations of other's perfection, love and acceptance has crushed your spirit...know that the only perfect, unconditional love and acceptance comes from above. I will not fear what can man do to me...perfect love cast out fear and I am loved perfectly by my Father in heaven.